Hall of Fame

Vacant honours

• Biggest single theft — no theft yet worthy of record. The Registry waits.
• Most stolen — no thefts yet. Cowards.
• Most expensive — nobody has paid for anything yet. The Registry holds its own titles at $1 and regards this as a low bar.
• Longest held — no holder has yet survived a week. The Registry is not impressed.
• Most prolific thieves — nobody has stolen twice. Prolific is a high bar, and the Registry keeps it there.
• Newest entries — no person has entered a record yet. The Registry will pretend not to notice.